Happiness

Someone once said “You do not choose your fate; you are chosen by it” Truthfully, I never cared about these words before. I never needed to. But after my view over the world and over my life changed, I started to wonder… It was the first day of the summer break. After a long year of learning and working for my supposedly future, I really needed a break. My mood was exactly the opposite of the weather. However, it did feel nice; the heat on my skin, the freshness of the morning, all of these elements were enjoyable. The streets were befuddled with people who were definitely fast for their height. I was walking aimlessly through Tokyo. My thoughts were moving from one subject to another, ending with an inner battle. I was feeling empty which wasn’t exactly a characteristic of mine. Lately, I just started to wonder if my place was in Tokyo. Has it been my idea to finish a college in Japan? Was my dream to finish management and business? I did wonder. Have I been wasting precious time for nothing?

A small brunette sighed and placed her hands on the railing. The city was crowded on a daily basis yet that day was suffocating. Maybe it was because it was the beginning of summer; or maybe the sun got everyone wishing to spend the day outdoors. Who knew? There were children who were playing around; women trying to move through them; teenagers gossiping and there was even a clown! Overall, the view was marvelous. It was a pity for a photographer to dare miss such scenery. That wasn’t going to happen, though. A young and tall man took pictures of every detail; every group wandering around; every expression and every move. His eyes landed on foreigner woman leaning against the railing. He couldn’t stop himself from taking a picture of her. Her hair was loose and the tips were curled, maybe from humidity; her body was small but compared to Japanese women she was definitely more curved; her eyes were fixed on a spot, like she was longing for something that seemed out of reach. She looked beautiful. Without noticing, the man walked closer to her. He couldn’t resist the force that seemed to bring him closer. He was intrigued and he wanted to see her up close. To look manlier, he took another picture of her. He had his camera in front of his eyes and was very concentrated. He didn’t realize that she turned her head and noticed him. He got perplexed when his objective met a pair of beautiful green eyes. “Sorry” Since she was a foreigner, he thought she wouldn’t know Japanese so he excused himself in broken English. She ignored him. She wasn’t preoccupied at all by his presence. She turned into the same position he had found her in and started to act as if he wasn’t even there. He sighed. He mirrored her movements and shifted his attention on the view. The water was calm and clear. There were fishes swimming here and there. He could actually see the path they were going on. He grabbed his camera quickly and started to take pictures. Sensing that she had been impolite, the woman turned her head towards him. She watched him closely. His face was contorting into different expressions depending on the shoot. “I’m fine with it” He stopped mid-action and glanced at her. He put his camera down and chuckled, almost nervously. He wasn’t actually expecting a response from her, to begin with. “About the pictures you took with me. I’m fine with it” He nodded and smiled to himself. Somehow, he felt as if he should start a conversation. It was awkward. “Where-uh-from-“He was stuttering while trying to find the right translation. She raised an eyebrow. “Where am I from?” Her response was in Japanese. He stopped and laughed at his thoughts. How could he not think she might have known Japanese? “I’m from England but I’ve been in Tokyo for 3 years now” She titled her head to the side continued to stare at him closely. “Any more questions?” He sighed and brushed a hand through his hair. “You look ready to stretch your hand towards the horizon?” His question ran deeper than he intended. Her mood dropped from superiority to sorrowful. She sighed heavily and turned to look over the lake. “I guess I am searching for something; maybe a reason” She furrowed her eyebrows in frustration while he simply copied her actions. “Maybe answers” “Answers to what?” She sighed again and fully turned to him. She leaned against the bridge and bit her lip. “Life is quite long don’t you think?” Hearing such words, the poor man thought he might have started a conversation with a woman who wanted to commit suicide. “There are people who would like to tell you otherwise” She scoffed. “You need a reason to live, right? But what happens when that reason changes? What if it wasn’t there to begin with?” That seemed to perplex him for a second. “I guess” He trailed. “I always thought it’s better to follow the wind. Life is often misunderstood and when you get fed up with it you choose the easy way out” She continued to watch him silently. His theory sounded quite philosophical and she was curious to hear it out. “I believe there’s also good in life. You can’t expect happiness to fall from the sky. You have to sweat for it” He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. She seemed deep in thought; probably analyzing his words. “So” He walked a little bit closer to her and smiled. She raised her head and looked into his eyes. It was hard to understand what was going through her head. “What do you need to make you happy right now?” She blinked. When she realized what he asked, she opened her mouth yet no sound came out. She had no idea. “Anything, I guess” He bit his lip and started to think about his next move. He caught sight of two people -two lovers- who were amused by the clown’s actions. He grabbed her hand and figured exactly where and how to plant a smile on her lips. Even if he didn’t know her, he didn’t care. [i]He was my wind Against what he believed in, he was the happiness that just fell from the sky[/i] 2: Nao-kun
Nao-kun

While walking at quite a fast pace, her eyes trailed to their tangled hands. It felt strange, like energy from his body was slowly slipping into hers. Also, his hand was warm and seemed to fit hers perfectly.

"So strange" She whispered, trying not to get his attention. Unfortunately, the man had good hearing and so he stopped. She didn't quite know why, since it seemed nothing looked the same as she remembered. There were more clowns and definitely more children.

"This is the place I like to come to," He raised his head a little, letting the wind go through his short messy hair, and smiled softly.

Her eyes trailed from him to the scenery. There were a few small shops which gave street food and drinks; there were a few children around two clowns who were trying to be funny and creative; the wind blew and so, it took one of the many balloons into the sky. It looked beautiful and somehow taken from a movie. She got entranced by the view and forgot completely about the one who got her there.

"Oi!"

He exclaimed when he saw her walking towards one of the street shops. She didn't turn nor react in any way so instead of trying to get her back, he let her lead the way.

Her smile was contagious. Just at the view of a few women making sushi on the spot, made her eyes sparkle and she licked her lips. The photographer chuckled amusedly and took a picture of both the working women and the excited customer.

"So you like it?" He asked when they both got back on wandering around. She nodded and took a bite of her newly bought sushi. He laughed softly and both walked in silence.

Out of nowhere, one of the clowns looked intently at them and grabbed the artist with him. He was perplexed by the action while she started to laugh loudly.

"Are you scared?" She asked, going closer to the two.

He couldn't respond because the clown pulled him closer and started to make signs towards the watching children. They started to laugh when he made a funny face but the photographer wasn't amused yet.

"Come on-" She stopped. She completely forgot to ask his name. Her lips formed a thin line and she started to think how she got somewhat kidnapped by that mysterious guy.

The clown told the still unnamed man to take hold of a box since he was tired and it was too heavy. He did so. At one point, the box started to shake. When it finally stopped, it was too strange and he back off. At that time, the box opened and a pie had been pushed into his face by a weird mechanism. He didn't look too happy but she did. When he saw how hard she was laughing and how much fun she was having, he let a small smile catch his lips too.

"That was so funny!" She exclaimed when he got off the handmade stage. He still had a few pieces of vanilla on his cheeks and nose, even though he did clean up. Seeing how she was too amused, he took a piece from his cheek and placed it on hers. She stopped and playfully glared at him. She hit him, which definitely had some force because it hurt, and cleaned herself up.

"Where should we go now...?" It was more of a question to himself but she responded.

"I have an idea" He looked at her and waited. "Why don't you tell me your name first?" Her expression was funny. She had one eyebrow raised, her head was tinted to the right and she was biting her lower lip in a weird way.

"Nao," He said while leaning down to her level. "My name is Nao" He was ready to start walking again, leaving her behind.

"Doesn't he want to know my name too?" She whispered to herself, a little confused by his behaviour. Well, at least she knew how to call him and it was enough for the moment.

"Where to next, captain?" She asked in English, making a army sign. He smiled and shrugged.

"Wherever" She puffed her cheeks and nodded.

Wherever they will end up, it was definitely going to be fun. She was sure about that.

3: One Day
One Day

They did end up somewhere close to the center of Tokyo. The shopping center was packed and when he saw her eyes lighting up, he felt a shiver go down his spine. However, her eyes weren't on the shopping center She smiled softly and walked in front. He got curious where she was heading to and trailed behind.

The place she wanted so badly to go to was a few streets down, in an emptier and more silent neighborhood. His eyes trailed over every block on the street. The people around didn't give him a second glance; they were completely uninterested of what was around them.

"This place is creepy," The girl laughed and shook her head. She chose to wait up for him since the shop she was looking for wasn't too far.

"This is actually one of the nicest places I've ever been to. Some of my friends live around her."

"It's too silent. It feels like we're not in Tokyo any more." She chuckled and placed her hands into the small pockets of her thin sweater.

"It's here."

They stopped in front of a small coffee shop, which looked a bit abstract. The building looked very old and almost haunted. When they entered, he got a shock. It was amazingly done inside. It smelled of freshly made coffee and wood. There was a small portion where the bar was and on the opposite were a few tables. On the walls, there were pictures of old Japanese and Western indie bands and different pieces of art. She walked deeper into the building and opened another door. Nao found himself more and more amazed. The second looked like a traditional English living room. It has posters with different English personalities and characters. One wall was occupied by a library, each shelf full with diverse literature; the rest of the walls were simply covered with different art objects older customers have brought. There were also a few cushions and three small coffee tables.

"It's nice, huh?" She sat on one of the cushions and sighed, happily. He walked towards the library and scanned the titles and authors. "This is the first place I had ever come across when I first came to Tokyo. I was intrigued why they used United Kingdom as a muse," Her eyes trailed to the pictures on the walls. "They said it's because of music and the impact the English literature had on the world." Her eyes also trailed to the new acquaintance. He was dressed in a pair of black pants, had a white shirt and a colourful cardigan over it. He looked entranced by the magic of that collection of literature.

"This place…How could I have not known about it?" She laughed and walked near him. She touched one book and grabbed it out.

"Sometimes we choose to ignore the things that look different. This building looks awful outside, but inside, it leaves you speechless." He bent his head, thinking.

When he heard the door open and close, he realized she walked out. He sighed and took another look at his surroundings. The room was beige. Everything was very simple but classy and tasteful.

"Are you still admiring the room?" He got completely stunned when she walked back in with two recipients in her hands, unnoticed. She placed the cups down on the table and took her spot back. He also sat opposite her and relaxed.

"How come I feel like is winter instead of summer?" He stated, amused. She chuckled and took a sip from her beverage.

"Because it gives off a comforting feeling, homey even." She sighed and looked up to him. "It's not hot coffee. I know it's pretty hot outside and here it isn't any better." His smile disappeared completely from his face and stared intently into her eyes.

"Who are you?" She bit her lip and clicked her tongue.

"You can call me Nana." He nodded, though he wasn't sure why she didn't tell him her real name. " I'm in my last year of University. I study Business and Management." He was a little surprised she gave him details about her life, even if they weren't that important.

" I'm a freelancer. I don't have a job right now." They both looked into each others' eyes yet none spoke another word. It didn't feel awkward. It felt normal, intense even. However, they both felt it…

I knew that was the first and last time we will ever meet. I could feel it in my heart and I was sure he did too. It was unfortunate but looking into his eyes, back then, made me want to learn more about him and his life. I didn't ask much and didn't tell much either. We started to talk about usual subjects like books and music but it was obvious he was trying hard not to ask me about different things, to ask me about what we had talked about when we just met. Life and reasons; happiness and dreams. But he didn't because we didn't have the chance to talk about the old times. One day. It was just a one day meeting.

4: Fireworks
Fireworks

Outside was dark when the two got out of the café. Nana shuddered, not expecting to be so chilly at night. She completely forgot how she was dressed. Nao remarked how her muscles tensed and figured it was because it had gotten colder. He didn't give her his sweater, like any man would have; instead, he pulled her closer to him and hugged her. They both stopped breathing for a few seconds. The force between them became obvious. Trying not to show the fireworks inside his heart, Nao started to walk, bringing Nana with him.

In the darkness, with few people around, Nao didn't have a clue where he was going. He simply led the way to somewhere. While wandering on the streets they heard a big noise which seemed to make the ground shake. Their heads rose to the sky just in time to see the fireworks. Nao chuckled. It was amusing how his feelings have been materialized. Nana's eyes were enlightened and the green orbs looked even more beautiful. Nao turned his back to the other side and closed his eyes, trying to regain control over his heart and body.

Back on the road to nowhere, Nana shuddered again and, unconsciously, got even closer to him, grabbing his hand. Out of nowhere, Nao stopped.

"Are we lost?" Nana chuckled silently and shook her head. He tried to figure if it was the same path they took when they first arrived but the streets looked different in the night.

"We're fine. A few more steps and we're back to the crowded and noisy centre of Tokyo."

It was cute how he panicked back then. It made me feel protected even if he didn't know his way around. His grip on my hand tightened but I was sure he didn't even remark it. When we got back on the known path, I pulled away and walked next to him, at a normal distance. He walked me back home. I didn't want it to end but I didn't want it to last either. Maybe, that thought was what kept me from looking after him. It was just one day.

"Thanks for taking me home." He chuckled and ruffled her head. It felt personal and weird. However, seeing how she didn't protest, he believed it was fine. " I'm surprised you did, actually. You seemed freaked out back there."

"OI! I was just tensing up! Who knew when someone might have stroke?!" She rolled her eyes and pushed him playfully. He chuckled and caught her hand.

In that moment, that touch was enough to send me over the edge. My feelings exploded and I couldn't control myself any more I remember I was the one to take action. I walked so close that I could feel the heat emitting from his body. I didn't care if he would respond or not, but I did have my own theories about the connection between us. Our lips were just a breath away. I will never forget the moment he leaned in and kissed me. I could swear everything else disappeared and there remained just the two of us. From a small peck, we got into my apartment and then…Let's just say that one day have been the best of my entire life.

When I woke up the next morning, he wasn't there anymore. I knew it would have come to this. I knew what we had was simply the spur of the moment. However, that man changed me. He turned my entire world upside down by just being there. Someone who meant close to nothing became someone for me and I became someone for the world.

5: Reality
Reality

4 years later...

"Anna! Come quick! You're on the news again!" The small brunette that once had her hair long and loose with the tips curled became a grown up adult. Her hair was shorter, she had bangs and her green eyes looked even bigger because of the eye liner She wasn't any more some girl who was searching for a reason to live. She had found it.

"Huh. Who would have thought some shitty book will get so much attention…" She placed her head on one hand while the other held the remote. Her flat mate, Rosie, seemed offended by her friend's words.

"Shitty? It's brilliant! The best you came up with! The story is so romantic! Who would have thought that one day with some stranger would turn up to become a love story! It's beautiful." Anna watched her friend quietly. She never told anyone from where she got the idea. She simply wrote it down and in no time, it became a box office success in Europe and Asia.

"You know, I wrote other books too…Why don't you praise them like this?" She mumbled loud enough for her friend to hear. Rosie scoffed and jumped on the couch, next to Anna.

"Because it doesn't have the same feeling to it. You wrote before about death and about depression. This is about pure love! From where did you even get this idea? Lovers in Tokyo…" Anna chuckled and placed her feet close to her chest. No one could stop the small smile forming on her lips. Not even the last four years of loneliness.

"I lived it." Rosie widened her eyes and opened her mouth. "I met him four years ago, right before entering my last year of college. It was just one day and one man that changed my world. So, I choose to change others' worlds too by writing about it." Rosie nodded.

"What about the ending?" Anna started to laugh loudly, giving Rosie the bitter feelings she felt through the years.

"There's no ending. I created one. The man I met wasn't one that could've been kept into one place. He was someone who simply went after the wind." After the last sentence, she walked into her room, leaving a melancholic Rosie behind.

Behind the closed doors of her room, Anna walked to her desk and opened the second drawer. She grabbed a picture which seemed to have been torn from a newspaper and stared at it. It sent bitter sweet feelings through her heart which were shown through a frown.

A few hours later, when it was seemingly getting dark, Anna found herself stuck with her fellow friends who were also artists, into a noisy pub. Rosie was the one who gathered everyone at the table so she could tell the big news to everyone. The brunette wasn't too happy with the location but she did enjoy the time with her mates.

"So," She started but the noise was covering her tiny, female voice. She rolled her eyes and grunted. "I said ,SO!'" She yelled. The whole room got silent and every pair of eyes turned to her. The scowl she previously had transformed magically into a sweet smile. "I have some big news regarding our brilliant friend, Anna!"

"Are you getting married?" One of the boys asked the culprit, frowning.

Anna gulped down her drink, already fed up with the surreal attention she was getting. That didn't stop the stares, making her drink even faster.

"Idiots. It's about the book. It reached the American box office too! Aren't you happy?" Everyone groaned. "That means we get paid more." The whole table started to cheer. While Rosie went back to her seat, Anna glared at her.

"Who's more caught up into this story? The writer or the reader?" The blonde smiled sweetly and patter her friend's thigh.

"If you ever meet him again, thank me." She whispered before entering a fiery conversation between the people on the table. Anna rolled her eyes but couldn't agree with her. It wasn't meant to be so that, logically, meant they will never meet again.

On the path back home, the blonde was so drunk that she couldn't walk at least one meter without tripping over her own feet. The older woman couldn't say she was fed up with her friend's behaviour because she already got accustomed with her personality, which hadn't been easy. London was famous for the rainy weather and that night didn't make an exception. The fortunate fact was that the two girls were really close to the apartment.

Inside the elevator, Rosie started to talk nonsense while Anna was furiously pushing the 6th floor's button. She was calm but inside, she was sure she would have killed the younger woman and makes it look like a suicide. She was a good sadistic writer, she could even use one of her many stories to cover the crime. Even she was surprised when, after 3 years since the incident, she wrote it down like it happened yesterday. She sighed and rubbed her forehead. The consummation of alcohol started to take a tool on her head too.

"Lover in Tokyo, huh?" Even worse was when Rosie decided to make her feel miserable. After a funny hiccup and a few slurred words that she couldn't understand, she grabbed the blonde's hand and walked out of the elevator and inside their apartment, having a few problems with getting the keys. On one hand she had Rosie and on the other she had her purse and a few more groceries.

After Rosie had been tucked in her bed safely, Anna walked into the kitchen, not sleepy yet. She changed into a loose shirt and long pyjama pants and, on her way to making tea, she also turned on the TV. While waiting for the water to heat up, she heard another show where her book was praised.

"It's not like I wrote it now. It's been out for a year now…" She mumbled while changing the channel. It was indeed a mystery how no one had ever heard about her in a year and, one day, out of nowhere, thousands of reporters appeared in front of her door.

She grabbed her favorite cup, which was bought from Japan, and poured the sweet tea inside. The steam rising from the hotness of the water seemed to get Anna into a melancholic state. She sighed hard, like she just left her soul out, and walked towards the TV. She sat on the couch and cuddled into the softness of it, the cup held tightly in her hands. The program was boring, nothing seemed to get old but nothing new appeared. It was like a vicious cycle. Everything on the television was bullshit and she knew that. It was all too faked and covered: old stories, arranged so that they would look new. It was overwhelming.

In that moment I realized what he meant. I was getting miserable, bored of everything. I did go with the flow and ended up back in England, with a University finished in management and business but I became a writer. I really didn't know what reason I could find to live happily. What was happiness? I started to ask myself. I wanted to get the easy way out but that path was definitely not in Europe.

6: Too Common
Too Common

A few hours later, when it was seemingly getting dark, Anna found herself stuck with her fellow friends who were also artists, into a noisy pub. Rosie was the one who gathered everyone at the table so she could tell the big news to everyone. The brunette wasn't too happy with the location but she did enjoy the time with her mates.

“So,” She started but the noise was covering her tiny, female voice. She rolled her eyes and grunted. “I said ,SO!’”  She yelled. The whole room got silent and every pair of eyes turned to her. The scowl she previously had transformed magically into a sweet smile. “I have some big news regarding our brilliant friend, Anna!”

“Are you getting married?” One of the boys asked the culprit, frowning.

Anna gulped down her drink, already fed up with the surreal attention she was getting. That didn't stop the stares, making her drink even faster.

“Idiots. It’s about the book. It reached the American box office too! Aren't you happy?” Everyone groaned. “That means we get paid more.” The whole table started to cheer. While Rosie went back to her seat, Anna glared at her.

“Who’s more caught up into this story? The writer or the reader?” The blonde smiled sweetly and patter her friend’s thigh. 

“If you ever meet him again, thank me.” She whispered before entering a fiery conversation between the people on the table. Anna rolled her eyes but couldn't agree with her. It wasn't meant to be so that, logically, meant they will never meet again.

On the way back home, the blonde was so drunk that she couldn't walk at least one meter without tripping over her own feet. The older woman couldn't say she was fed up with her friend’s behavior because she already got accustomed with her personality, which hadn't been easy. London was famous for the rainy weather and that night didn't make an exception. The fortunate fact was that the two girls were really close to the apartment.

Inside the elevator, Rosie started to talk nonsense while Anna was furiously pushing the 6th floor’s button. She was calm but inside, she was sure she would have killed the younger woman and makes it look like a suicide. She was a good sadistic writer, she could even use one of her many stories to cover the crime. Even she was surprised when, after 3 years since the incident, she wrote it down like it happened yesterday. She sighed and rubbed her forehead. The consummation of alcohol started to take a tool on her head too.

“Lover in Tokyo, huh?” Even worse was when Rosie decided to make her feel miserable. After a funny hiccup and a few slurred words that she couldn't understand, she grabbed the blonde’s hand and walked out of the elevator and inside their apartment, having a few problems with getting the keys. On one hand she had Rosie and on the other she had her purse and a few more groceries.

 

After Rosie had been tucked in her bed safely, Anna walked into the kitchen, not sleepy yet. She changed into a loose shirt and long pyjama pants and, on her way to making tea, she also turned on the TV. While waiting for the water to heat up, she heard another show where her book was praised.

“It’s not like I wrote it now. It’s been out for a year now…” She mumbled while changing the channel. It was indeed a mystery how no one had ever heard about her in a year and, one day, out of nowhere, thousands of reporters appeared in front of her door.

She grabbed her favourite cup, which was bought from Japan, and poured the sweet tea inside. The steam rising from the hotness of the water seemed to get Anna into a melancholic state. She sighed hard, like she just left her soul out, and walked towards the TV. She sat on the couch and cuddled into the softness of it, the cup held tightly in her hands.  The program was boring, nothing seemed to get old but nothing new appeared. It was like a vicious cycle. Everything on the television was bullshit and she knew that. It was all too faked and covered: old stories, arranged so that they would look new. It was overwhelming.

In that moment I realized what he meant. I was getting miserable, bored of everything. I did go with the flow and ended up back in England, with a University finished in management and business but I became a writer. I really didn't know what reason I could find to live happily. What was happiness? I started to ask myself. I wanted to get the easy way out but that path was definitely not in Europe.